Stop Being A Victim

“Why always me?”

“Why everything goes wrong with me?”

“Why everybody hurts me?”

“Why everyone else’s life is better than mine?”

If you find yourself saying or thinking about above statements then this post is for you.

Hello Everyone!

Today, I’m going to talk about Victim mentality. It is a mentality of a person who always acts like a victim to every negative events happening in his/her life.

Still confused? Don’t worry , after reading this post you’ll be identify & also fix the Victim mentality ( In case you have it).

What Is A Victim Mentality?

First let’s try to understand the term Victim. Victim is a person who has experienced any kind of negative experience. For example: Mistreatment, Insult, Loss, Hatred, etc.

So, Victim mentality is a personality trait where a person always thinks of himself/herself as a victim. A person who complains and blames others for any kind of misfortune happening with him/her.

For example:

I’m sure you know someone who keeps complaining about their life. Whether it is about their Relationships, Job, Studies, Family, etc. They always acts as a victim who’s facing difficulties due to others. And he/she will try to seek approval from others & avoid taking responsibility of their own life.

Like a person who keeps blaming others for doing wrong instead of analyzing mistakes of his/her own.

Effects Of Victim Mentality

  • Too much of Negativity – A person with a victim personality has negative reaction to every event occurring around. His/her mind gets wired to think only negative thoughts about everything. So this person will always tend to find negatives in most positive things.
  • No Responsibility – With victim mentality a person will never take responsibility of his/her own actions. This person will always blame others for anything wrong happening. He/she will always held others responsible for everything wrong happened in their life.
  • Lack of Motivation – There will be no motivation to work harder for anything. As the victim is busy blaming others & not taking responsibility, he/she will mostly spend time and energy in complaining. So there will be no motivation to work harder or find a solution to the problem.
  • Dependence on others – A victim always seeks approval from others. He/she tends to rely on others for support all the time. So they get dependent on others. And depending on others is the most dangerous thing as you’re actually giving someone rights to hurt you. When you get dependent on anyone , chances of getting hurt are more.

These were some effects of the victim mentality. But how to overcome this mentality?

How To Stop Being A Victim?

  • Think Positive – Think positive thoughts. I’m sure you already have heard this from many people. And positive thinking really works. Whenever something happens against you will, instead of blaming yourself, your fate, god or anyone else try to take it in a positive way. Think of that negative situation as an opportunity to grow yourself. That’s how you will be able to find solution for your problem. Negative thinking, Blaming or complaining will only make your situation worse.
  • Take Responsibility – This is the most important thing one should do i.e. Taking responsibility of own actions & decisions. Whatever happens to you, you must held yourself responsible for it. Whether the result is good or bad always take responsibility on your shoulders & keep going ahead. Never ever blame anyone else.
  • Find A Solution – Instead of dwelling over what went wrong, make efforts to find a solution for it. There’s solution to every problem. No matter how hard the problem is there is always a solution present. For example: If the problem is losing weight then it has the most simple solution, which is Regular exercise & healthy diet. So solutions are always present there and we already know them too. But where we fail is at the implementation of solution.
  • Take Challenges – Yes, look at negative situations as challenges. Whenever anything happens against your will, instead of taking it as a setback take it as a challenge. A challenge to grow yourself & to get through negative situations. A challenge to find yourself & get out of your comfort zone.

Final Words

This post is not to target specific people with victim mentality. Actually we all are victims to some extent. We all blame & complain about our life often. I act as victim too.

For example: Right now I’m not going to gym & I’m complaining about weather being too cold.

Solution to this is so simple which is wake up early & run towards gym. So simple isn’t it? But until I get rid of my victim mentality I won’t be able to implement this solution.

So this post is written for everyone and not for targeting anyone specific.

I would love to hear your thoughts about this topic. so don’t forget to comment your thoughts below.

Thank you for reading!


Hello , If anyone wants someone to talk to or wants to suggest me topics to write on then feel free to reach out.

You can contact me here.


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78 thoughts on “Stop Being A Victim

Add yours

  1. Over time, I’ve come to accept the fact that there will always be aspects that we hate about ourselves. As we go about our lives, we can work on improving ourselves. Even if we take slow steps towards the change to our ideal that we desire, at least it is something. I stopped caring so much about my weaknesses and hating myself for them. I mean, complaining about such things is not going to change anything, is it? I simply accept my flaws and continue living life to the best of my ability. Even if I keep messing up, I just let out a sigh, vent a little and continue moving forward, leaving the past in the past.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. This is a very powerful and insightful post, thank you so much! Made me think a lot. I don’t like to think of myself as victim but the truth is that I do act like one unconsciously many times! I often have this thought “Why everything goes wrong with me?”. I’m trying to depend less on others’ approval, I think that’s the number #1 aspect I need to sort out now ^^

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Great post! it’s interesting that I stumbled upon it today. This week I’m challenging myself to have a complaint free and negativity free week! I appreciate your insight!!! Happy Writing!

    Liked by 2 people

  4. I find myself in a victim mentality many times in my life but I am getting better because I am learning to take more responsibility for my actions. Instead of wallowing in self pity; I take action. I try to look at where I have gone wrong instead of blaming others. Thank for this post

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Wow, this is very insightful. I really appreciate how you chose you write on this topic. While reading, I had only one thought running in my head. I opted for a French class in July, and used to avoid it blaming that the faculty is teaching bad and the timings are not suitable, when infact, I was to blame. I didn’t understand it cause I didn’t really pay attention. 😹 But, in the end, I made all the wrongs right, by studying carefully and yay! Aced it would be an overstatement, but still, I did well in the exam. Not a victim anymore, yayy! 🙆

    Liked by 1 person

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  7. Hey there! Do you think victim mentality is a cause of nature or nurture?

    Studies show that people who exhibit victim mentality are more likely to exhibit tendencies of self-harm and some studies tell us that self-harm itself could be the result of either genetics or environment. I wonder what your take is, regarding this.

    Would someone be prone to play the victim and exhibit self-harm tendencies because of a hereditary leaning towards the same or because they’ve seen their families or their society give them the leeway to indulge in these behaviours?

    Liked by 1 person

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